Why You Should Totally Drink That Weird Green Stuff You May Have Seen Calvin and Sarah Drinking

Let’s be honest—green juice doesn’t exactly scream “treat yourself.” It’s usually a little chunky, smells like the underside of a lawnmower, and tastes like someone blended up a garden without cleaning off the dirt. But if Jack LaLanne—the godfather of modern fitness—were still here, you can bet he’d be gulping it down like it was liquid gold. Good ol' Jack wasn’t just the guy in the spandex jumpsuit doing fingertip push-ups on live television. He was a nutritional genius long before kale became cool. The man pulled boats with his teeth and swam handcuffed through frigid waters—for fun. You think he was scared of a little kale juice? Even at 99, Jack's widow, Elaine LaLanne is still chugging her green juices and exercising every day!

“If man made it, don’t eat it.”

That was one of Jack’s favorite sayings. The more natural, the better. And nothing says “nature’s bounty” like a cup full of pulverized spinach, beet greens, parsley, banana, and a splash of pineapple juice (for the sweetness).

He believed that real food—whole, raw, untampered-with—was the key to strength, longevity, and vitality. Green juice is like drinking all the building blocks of life with every gulp!

Eat to live, not live to eat:

Calvin and I didn't start drinking these things because they tasted like unicorn lattes (even though we now love the taste). Honestly, we started drinking them because we felt like it was easier than eating tons of salads.

So when you sip your green algae drink and feel the urge to gag? Remember Jack LaLanne, smiling while doing jumping jacks at 95 years old, telling you: “Your body is your most priceless possession. Take care of it!”

Final Thoughts:

In a world full of frappes and diet fads, drinking green juice is a rebellion—and a gift. It’s weird. It’s wonderful. It’s what multivitamins strive for, but will never achieve.

So throw some spinach in a blender, grimace proudly, and raise a glass to the legends. Your cells will thank you—even if your taste buds stage a protest.

LaLanne–Approved Green Juice Recipe

This classic green juice is a fan-favorite for a reason—nutrient-packed, refreshingly zingy, and just the right level of “I feel healthy already.”

Ingredients:

• 🥬 1 cucumber

• 🌱 2 cups kale (stems removed)

• 🌿 1 handful of parsley

• 🍋 1 lemon (peeled)

• 🍏 1 apple (for just a hint of sweetness)

• 🍊 1/4 cup FRESH SQUEEZED orange juice (none of that Simply Orange or Florida's Natural stuff)

• 🧄 Optional: 1-inch piece of ginger (for a spicy kick and to remind you you’re alive)

Instructions:

1. Wash all ingredients thoroughly.

2. Run everything through a blender (or juicer, if you're afraid of a little pulp).

3. Pour into a glass, make a face, smile proudly, and drink like a champion.

4. Feel the phytonutrients surge through your bloodstream.

Tip: Best served cold and with the unwavering belief that you’re going to live to 100.

Need a video tutorial? Check out our Green Smoothie Movie!